why i have never had a girl friend | owais wani

First things first , I don’t have a girl friend primarily because girls don’t like me. Now after shrugging off the responsibility of stating the obvious . I , for the benefit of my readers would like to go into the lesser known , lesser obvious and more intellectual reasons( which naturally makes them less acceptable)


I have always been devoid of fascinations and deams. When I was in kindergarten I didn’t want toys . when I was in primary classes I didn’t want video games. When I grew little older I didn’t want a bike . when I got into the “10+2” stage I didn’t want good grades. And , as expected by now , all throughout these years I didn’t think about having a girlfriend.



Modern day wisdom and hence pre-planning is not something associated with me. As such I could never hope of getting into a relation with the notion of leaving it with the it-didn’t-work-out excuse. This ,to my mind , is another strong reason of my failure on this front.

apocalypse of 2010 | owais wani

Inspired by the The legend of the apocalypse (bible, revelation 6:1-8:1) and our very apocalypse of 2010.

The first seal has been opened.
The apocalypse is in the offing.
The pestilence of tear gas shells,
A bow, nay! Just a catapult .
A catapult that would.
Put Thanatus to shame..
The second seal has been opened,
The swords have changed form.
They work from a distance now .
They kill much faster now .
The third seal has been opened,
The scales tilted in their favor .
The fourth seal has been opened,
The rider is still death.
The rider of pale green ‘gypsies’
Given the control to kill.
The fifth seal has been opened.
Martyrdom is still common .
They killed us then, they kill us now .
The sixth seal has been opened,
Programmed Disturbances , Normal disturbances .
The seventh seal awaits .
Or does it unfurl every day ??
The angels with trumpets blowing over the bodies of our children..

The legend of of Zeteshta Devi | owais wani

“Helloo”
“Helloo’

‘Wani get ready you are coming with me to zeeth yaar’
“Zeeth yaar , where the hell is that? . cze ma karnawakh me encounter”
“Cze @@#$$%^&*(**&^^ .lagu palaw jaldi . its in the lap of zabarwan hills , grand palace se thoda aage. you will enjoy it”
“Ok. Report here in half an hour.’


So half an hour later I found myself with Faheem driving through our busy but slow city. Secretariat , fly over , lal chowk , ma road , trc ,gupkar , grand palace. Every bodys mind is programmed to tunr left near grand palace towards boulevard.
I askd, cze kot pakan seudi ?
That’s where we have to go . climb that hill.

For the first time in my life I didn’t turn left near grand palace but continued straight on. We zoomed past the hotel gate. Just a few hundered yards down the hotel mgate we were stopped at a check point.
“Where to ?”
“Mandir”
“Mandir?? Enquired the police guy looking at my beard.”
“Not actually mandir , we have to meet Bansi lal”
“Ah , you can go.”
“Ye bansi saeb kusu, Faheema?”
“The care taker of the mandir and our customer”

Dawat e Fikr o Amal | Book Review by Mushtaq Ul Haq

Dawat e Fikr o Amal

Author= Waris Mazhari

Publisher= Foundation for Islamic Studies, Jamia Nagar, New Delhi

Year of Publication= 2009

Price= Not Mentioned                                          Pages= 176

The 9/11 incidents proved to be watershed in the Muslim-West Relations. The West on offensive and hostile towards the Muslim World and the Clash of Civilizations just round the corner. The aftermath of 9/11 was a period of hostility of West towards Muslims and anything Islamic, every notion, connotation, ideology and relation with the Muslim World was challenged, probed and delved into by the West in order to remedy as to what went wrong with the Muslims and why they ‘hate us’? These radical changes and different atmosphere even led some conscious Muslims to introspect about their shortcomings and identify the loopholes so as to plug the same.

One of the oldest institution of Muslim learning which even helped the Muslims to preserve their distinct identity, culture and religion even during the dark gloomy days of colonialism and alien rule i.e Madrasa became a bone of contention between the Muslims and West, as the latter alleged them to be the Bastions of Terrorists.

Kashmir Burns Again | Mushtaq Ul Haq

The inception of the year 2010 was marked with killing of Inayat Khan by CRPF personnel & these killings continued with the death of teenagers like Zahid Farooq & Wamiq Farooq at the hands of paramilitary troopers & Kashmir police. On June 11 Tufail Ahmad Mattoo was murdered in cold blood by police by aiming a tear gas shell at his head which alongwith the Fake Encounter killings of three innocent youth at Machil, Kupwara in May proved to be the last straw on the camel’s back and whole kashmir erupted as never before, with youth taking a lead in the indigenous protests and separatist leadership forced to chalk out some strategy which they did with the announcement of “Quit Kashmir Movement” on 24 June, 2010. With that initiated a never ending vicious circle of death, maim, torture and killing spree by the armed forces and kashmir police. The separatists began to issue unique calendars of Hartals and protests which people follow in letter and spirit with the result whole life and governance in kashmir being crippled for the past three months with death toll crossing hundred, there is no indication of the protests being abated or the killings being stopped with the people ready to offer even more sacrifices for what they perceive as Aazadi from Indian occupation.

Anecdote | by Owais Wani

To the general population he is the Sikh. No, that is not only his religion that is his name. A name that has served him better than any proper noun can. Nobody (almost) knows what his real name is. i myself had to ask him his name personally when my curiosity overtook me. when the thought of writing this came to my mind i asked my mother

"Mummy yi sikh kari pethi chu batmaelni?".

"amis gai waens akh yeth. yeli bi yor ayes yi ose tami wezi ti yeth", she replied with a distant gaze.

the sikh(with enormous respect) worked as a surgical assistant in one of the valley hospitals and is a RMP ( registered medical practitioner). he runs a small medical store from- God knows which year. Every afternoon he comes riding his bicycle. his bicycle being as austere as him. the handdle of the bicycle supports a basket made of light cast iron. the cycle frame is old but healthy and the torn seat is covered by a shiny "seat cover" to improve the aesthetics.

The most important thing about the bicycle is the fact that it was never replaced by a scooter.

Our sikh’s shop competes with his bicycle in austerity. It is a small room like thing with wooden shutters of the old type. the wall behind the counter is burdened with ill shaped shelves. shelves which hold up small boxes of medicine. He never keeps more than the bare minimum. A cursory look reveals he only keeps the routine over-the-counter stuff in his store. Add to that routine blood pressure controller-talmisartan , some botles of vitamin B complex an some antibiotcs. The highest i have ever seen or heard him prescribe is serratiopeptidase.